I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
