WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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