Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
