ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize