If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Randomize
