Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
