i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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