We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
vagina is talking i cant
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
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