Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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