The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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