I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
