I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
