I'm sorry my penis didn't work
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
