Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
50% drunk capacity currently
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
