drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
It's shark week go big or go home
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
