But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
