her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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