it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Randomize