Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
