So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
