Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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