have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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