Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I just want to make out with him forever
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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