Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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