just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
false alarm, still single
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
