I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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