Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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