Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize