You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
