well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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