Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
