I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
