when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
