our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
