I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
