she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
