i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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