I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
