I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
