I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
