I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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