So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Randomize