in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Farmville is her only friend.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
