I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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