Can Purell be used as lube?
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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