Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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