his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I have post one night stand depression
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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