So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
It's never too late to be topless.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
