i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
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