Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
