his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
