I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
They have beer where we have blood.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
