we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
